GUILTY as charged
Your punishment, sir, will be 10 days confinement to Camp Arifjan, Kuwait. You will serve your time consecutively, without opportunity for parole.
oh, and by the way, you are hereby robbed of the memories yet to be made at the home-coming celebration in El Paso with the soldiers you risked your life with for the past year. an irreplaceable life experience, to be sure
and you know i'm all about life experience